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I don't know why we don't already have a thread for funny excrement. Anyway, this is freaking hilarious from my new favourite sub:https://www.reddit.com/r/ContagiousLaughter/comments/ijxzlv/when_i_need_cheering_up_and_a_good_laugh_i_reach/
The New Jersey Devil keeps knocking over my trashcans at night and taking out credit cards in my name.
Crystal Meth Santa Clause: new band name, called it.