Crap Movies

[reuben]

John Wick 2. The original was a brilliantly dark and gritty revenge movie, where really bad guys fucked with the wrong person and things went very south for them. The sequel was a lazy pastiche with next to no plot, preferring instead to just do long, implausible and inelegant choreographed fight scenes in which Keanu Reeves does exactly the same thing over and over and over again - shoot a couple of guys in the knees and then the head, throw the third to the ground and hold him down while shooting the next two guys through the door before then shooting the guy on the floor, get up and run to the next room where he does the exact same thing again, saved multiple times by his magical bulletproof suit.

Ian McShane was fantastic again and The Continental is a terrific device, but if you just want to watch extended fight scenes go watch the Raid movies again. They did it way better.

I loved the mysterious underworld that they really only teased and hinted at in the first one.  Then they decided to dive directly into it in the second one, killing all of the intrigue.  I like the choreography, though; nothing holds up well against the Raid movies. 

[Johnny English]

I loved the mysterious underworld that they really only teased and hinted at in the first one.  Then they decided to dive directly into it in the second one, killing all of the intrigue.  I like the choreography, though; nothing holds up well against the Raid movies. 

Apparently there's a spinoff series about The Continental and its members in the works.

[Heismanberg]

John Wick does not belong in the crap movies thread

[AlioTheFool]

John Wick does not belong in the crap movies thread

This.

[reuben]

Not brought to you by the people who made Pearl Harbor, but it'll probably feel that way. 

I see no reason why Michael Bay and Roland Emmerich need to be separate beings.  Just merge them already.  Rochael Bayrich. 

[Johnny English]

Not brought to you by the people who made Pearl Harbor, but it'll probably feel that way. 

I see no reason why Michael Bay and Roland Emmerich need to be separate beings.  Just merge them already.  Rochael Bayrich. 

I've never seen Pearl Harbour, but I'm told that there's a battle scene which is amazing. I don't really have any interest in war movies so I haven't bothered.

[reuben]

I Am Mother.

*****SPOILER*****

Could have been a clever movie, but if you can do a bit of math in the first five minutes and guess how many years are in 17,000 days, then the whole thing is ruined.

[reuben]

https://youtu.be/FtSd844cI7U

[Badger]

https://youtu.be/FtSd844cI7U

This is a big moment for furries

[Johnny English]

Loved the first Pacific Rim. Watched the sequel tonight and it was abysmal.

[Miamipuck]

Loved the first Pacific Rim. Watched the sequel tonight and it was abysmal.

Yeah same

[Miamipuck]

The new Vin Diesel flick sucks balls. It's not worth it on any level.

[Badger]

The new Vin Diesel flick sucks balls. It's not worth it on any level.

Almost watched a bootleg stream out of curiosity.

[bojanglesman]

Every Vin Diesel flick sucks balls. It's not worth it on any level.

Fyp

[Badger]

Fyp

The best Diesel movies are the ones where he voiced a giant robot and an alien tree being.