Jet Offensive
Other Stuff => The Porta Potty => Topic started by: Miamipuck on February 11, 2015, 03:11:59 PM
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It just occurred to me that we don't have a Hall of Fame for the greatest posts in this place, now we do. Of course this one is going to be a unanimous entry:
I banged this child psychologist once, and she told me the reason women get attached to men is the Oxycotin or one of those chemicals. If you come in a girl, your sperm releases that and they get attached to you. It's the same chemical that babies release which makes the mother attached to them or something.
At least that's the excuse she gave me when telling me to use a condom.
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Still laughing about that
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Tommy has Oxycontin running through him, no wonder the hookers love him.
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Hahahaha
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That whole thread is great. The hits just keep on coming.
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That whole thread is great. The hits just keep on coming.
And you almost wanted that locked
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And you almost wanted that locked
If I were you I'd hope for it.
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If I were you I'd hope for it.
If you were me, you'd be a lot more fun.
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If you were me, you'd be a lot more fun.
That thread is certainly fun, but I don't think you realise why.
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And you almost wanted that locked
I wanted it locked because I figured SFD's post wasn't getting beat. I was wrong.
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That thread is certainly fun, but I don't think you realise why.
Yeah. I Wasn't talking about the thread.
And I also give zero fucks
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I'm debating whether to write a post or not to Ether people who were dicks in this thread.
That initial stripper post was actually to give some insight/anecdotal experience on things I've done. If i hated you guys or didn't respect you, I def wouldn't have shared that or the other stuff i've said. I just was giving insight on how to maximize your experience at a strip club and not be the typical poopchute who wastes a bunch of money for nothing. Go reread it, remove emotional bias and you'll see.
Tommy, Badger, Bo, and a few others either know me well enough or are nice enough people not to be dicks about things and take things the wrong way. Puck knows the deal too, even if he's mummified and fossilized at this point. I can't speak for others. A couple of the married + smarmy guys(i.e. both, not just one) seem particularly defensive about it.
I'm only posting this because I'm drunk, but honestly if I wanted to be "bragging" i'd post pics of my exs, tinder girls, and other girls i've fucked in the past. Why in the freaking world would i care to try to impress this group? I can't conjure one way in which that'd serve me. It's an area i've had a large amount of success in, and I feel like too many shoot themselves in foot for. I've refrained from making snarky comments. For a community that fawns over celebrities or other random and irrelevant women they basically put on a pedestal (they shouldn't) it's pretty ironic that i'm getting slammed for the things I've said.
but mostly, I don't give a excrement. If anyone spent 10 minutes with me they wouldn't even question the things I've wrote. I've lived a really fun and uniquely interesting life, and I think most people tend to limit themselves so I don't mind sharing knowledge where it's suitable. Some people take that as an afront to their manhood, which is stupid and insecure. In fact, for the idiots saying "women are not a puzzle" (they're not, because a puzzle is linear. hence art over science), I had this very conversation about human and male/female dynamics with this smoking hot light skinned bollywood looking Indian girl tonight for a good 20-30 minutes. She completely agreed. We danced almost the whole night, made out and she and her 3 friends want to hang out tomorrow at the pool. One of her other friends who i was talking to for a bit said "I get exactly why <indian girl's name> was into you", and proceeded to get ultra touchy and flirty with me too.
So, yeah....i'm sure I sound like a douche with this post but it's only because a select few people act like faggots with the mob mentality.
lmao
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Hahahahaha
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Puck that was a compliment.
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Puck that was a compliment.
Lol I know, even if it wasn't, it's still a fantastic post.
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Mariota is such a guido.
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Beat me to it lol
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Re: Adrian Peterson
One year of sitting on a beach for knocking out your fiancé. Nice.
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Oh excrement I'm way off the mark today.
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No thanks, Kaepernick is such a guido.
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How the freak are puzzles linear?
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Yep. The league has gotten a bit better about its retired players, but a lot more needs to be done to help these guys evaluate their lives outside the game. It's awful watching what can happen as far as lifelong damage after even an injury free career.
Of course, this point is lost on an awful lot of people. JE said to me recently that he doesn't give a freak about lifetime suffering because he doesn't consider them people. Just things that have been paid well to suffer massive lifelong pain for his enjoyment.
There has to be a balance between preserving the enjoyment of the league and taking care of the people who make it great.
You didn't really give me a chance to explain myself though. My point was, I cheer for laundry. I'm not going to spend time worrying about guys getting paid millions to cause each other serious injuries, it's for them to figure out. As long as the product is entertaining, I don't really care. Not my problem to solve. You could apply the same logic to boxing or wrestling or motor racing or movie stuntmen or a wide range of other pursuits.
I love it when I agree with you.
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How do you know that's what he wants?
Because if I wanted to kill the maximum number of people possible and then get away without being caught, I wouldn't choose a high profile event with TV and security cameras everywhere. It wasn't his plan - his brother was supposedly the brains behind the operation - but publicity was absolutely a key part of it, as it usually is in terrorist attacks.
Maybe that's what his brother wanted, but we have no way of knowing if deep down if Dz wants that anymore. For all we know he desperately wants to avoid the death penalty and live out his remaining years studying the Korean or some excrement.
hahahaha
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hahahaha my god
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At least put it into the typo thread. Why here?
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(http://www.quickmeme.com/img/01/01db24761d32862df6a1f73f80e5f367f951f5fc08ef7b74e8512b7885e98e79.jpg)
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At least put it into the typo thread. Why here?
Why not it was hilarious.
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Half the viking face (avatar) thread belongs here.
This thread was built for YOU, tommy.
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Half the viking face (avatar) thread belongs here.
This thread was built for YOU, tommy.
Hahaha nice avatar.
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freak you. You worthless piece of excrement. I'd like to see you come try it. It takes hard work and dedication not that you would know about those from your little pee wee football team. If you want to get through the challenges you have to be strong as hell. It's easy to excrement on me and my passions from your keyboard but show up in my house and I will teach you what a warrior is.
for safe keeping
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I'm not reading an article written by a woman.
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Haha I just finally figured out the title. I was wondering why Travolta's name was up there. That's fucked up.
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Haha I just finally figured out the title. I was wondering why Travolta's name was up there. That's fucked up.
you're welcome
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If it doesn't have a handle, it's a beaker or a mug. It's not about size, it's about the temperature of the contents.
I can't tell the difference between anything when I've just got out of bed, don't have my lenses in and am waiting for the coffee to brew. I expect to be able to reach into the fridge, grab something yogurt-shaped and the freaking thing taste nice. I shouldn't have to do stuff like read.
No breakfast is complete without a cistern of coffee.
Ever have your cistern of coffee with a cauldron of oatmeal?
So what would you call the red or blue plastic party cup you drink beer out of at a keg party? A beaker?
Who left the bloody blue beaker of beer sitting here?
Do struggling university students eat Beaker Noodles in England?
I'm going to enjoy a few chalices of wine later.
You know that's actually what a chalice is for, right?
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Have you watched every game for every team this year?
Because the numbers are saying 3 of the top 4 run stopping DL are on the Jets
I'd imagine the odds of that is comparable to getting diagnosed with covid cancer and aids all the same day
That would depend on how many of your posts the person read that day.
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lmao
hahahahaha